Tuesday, 23 August 2011

Take a walk...Write on Wednesdays

For this week's write on wednesdays challenge, we were instructed to take a walk and come back and write about what you encountered, writing in such a way that your sentences feel the way the walking felt.

I started to do this, and wrote a few lines, but then I admit I got distracted by a little seed of inspiration for a piece of fictional writing so decided to follow that instead! Apologies for not following the instructions!

I hope you enjoy it though, let me know with your comments what you think :)

This was the first few lines that I wrote...

As she took her first reluctant step off the moss-strewn patio she gasped as the soft spongey grass squidged underneath her bare feet. Wrapping her cardigan tighter around her, she began a slow meander across the field behind the manor house in which she was staying. After only a few steps the feeling of the dewy morning grass curling up between her well-manicured toes made her smile.
She couldn't remember the last time she had felt this peaceful. She paused in her walk to peer up into the towering oak tree that was a short distance from her, and watched a playful squirrel scurrying up the tree's gnarled old trunk.

But then this was what I decided to go with...

She sighed grumpily as she picked her way across the uneven terrain. Stumbling slightly in her Versace pumps she peered up ahead where her boyfriend of a few years and his parents were striding enthusiastically across the golf course, looking as if they were having the time of their lives in their hiking boots and waterproof jackets. Louise on the other hand, had been thoroughly unprepared for this 'casual stroll' as they had put it. Wanting to impress the potential future parents-in-law, she had thought she was being sensible when she had packed pretty, demure outfits that were extraordinarily unsuitable for any kind of serious outdoor activity and provided her with no more warmth than a pair of knickers. And as for shoes, Ricky's mother had frowned rather confusedly when watching Louise line up her choice of footwear for the few days that she was there.
When the 'fantastic idea' of a bracing stroll had been suggested this morning, Louise had glanced nervously over her shoulder at her new designer pumps (a necessity for a day out), sexy heels (a necessity for a night out) and cute beaded flip flops (a necessity for a sunny day) and gulped anxiously at the thought of trudging through a cow-pat covered field and ruining one of her best-loved pairs of shoes.
She had attempted to tempt Ricky away from the walk and into a more fashion-friendly activity (such as shopping or sunbathing), and failing that had even resorted to muttering seductively and lying on the bed provocatively to attempt to escape from the hell of having to brave the 'great outdoors'. Unfortunately her adorably laid-back boyfriend had merely grinned at her cheekily and told her to wait until this evening whilst simultaneously tying up his hideous yet 'practical' walking boots and ushering her out the door.
Louise had just been stood by the front door miserably slipping on her pumps, when Ricky's good-hearted mum Sandra came wondering out of the kitchen carrying a pair of the oldest, muddiest, grubbiest wellington boots that she had ever seen. As Sandra thrust the offending boots in Louise's direction, she suddenly cottoned onto the fact that she was supposed to wear the revolting things due to her lack of walking attire. Trying not to recoil in horror as the dirt-ingrained wellies were dropped too close to her pretty shoes, she had murmured a few pathetic explanations and excuses for why she would be fine in her pumps. Despite her understanding that the boots she was being offered were probably the most sensible option, the thought of putting her delicate foot in some skanky thirty-year-old wellie boots was more than she could handle.
So now here she was, staggering over hidden molehills and trying her best to keep up with the others and make a good impression, whilst all the time thinking unhappily of the sunny pub gardens that her and Ricky could be sat in right now enjoying a glass of Pimm's.
Looking up she suddenly realised that the others had stopped and were waiting for her to catch up. Feeling a little flustered at being caught so obviously out of her comfort zone, she giggled awkwardly and plastered what she hoped was an expression of 'I'm having a lovely time' onto her face.
'We were thinking of walking over to the lake so you and Rick can try out wakeboarding or even rock climbing if you fancied it!'
Louise looked desperately at Ricky for help just as he smirked good-naturedly at her ridiculously horrified expression. 



  1. What a whinger - that girl sounds like high maintenance...but we all know one and can occasionally be one haha I enjoyed this!

  2. I think we have all had those moments when we are putting on a show for someone! I loved reading this piece and I laughed out loud on a few parts. I could picture this woman wearing those types of shoes! Great writing piece!

  3. Oops. Wardrobe fail. This made me laugh, and I must admit, I felt a little sorry for her. Very enjoyable.

  4. Haha I loved it! I'm glad I have a practical down to earth wife that knows how to dress for any and all occasions. This story made me appreciate my wife more than ever! lol Thank you for this great story!

  5. LOL, poor thing couldn't have saved herself if they tied a floating around her waist. That's what I call getting in your own way! Sadly, I kind of recognise this silly girl - that mistaken need to hang onto her sense of pride even at the cost of reputation! I enjoyed this!

  6. I felt a little for her I must say. Nothing worse than trying to impress and getting it wrong!

  7. Imagine Louise climbing in her pumps but still smiling and saying, "I can do this with all my grace, watch me."haha! This is a fun read! You did a pretty good job!



  8. Oh no, she does sounds like hard work. I like that you followed your instinct on this exercise. You captured her distate perfectly and brought us the same cheeky humour you do so well each week. Great take on the prompt

    Gill x

  9. Because I love your blog, I've chosen you to receive the Versitile Blogger Award.

    See my post: http://peopledonteatenoughfudge.blogspot.com/2011/09/versitile-blogger.html x


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